You are my Grace, I am your Monster

I remember the day when your mother told me she was pregnant

They were difficult times meshed with moments of joy

We had just celebrated our one year anniversary

Sean was just ten months old

And I knew you would be a girl as I knew your brother was going to be a boy

I dreamt of you, your hair color, your name, your destiny

And I cherished every thought of you until you were born

The dream came in your guise, I was there

When they tore you from your mother, a handful of ginger plump

Soft downy red, light hazel eyes and a soft mew of a cry

I loved you even more.

Yet you came into a world of upheaval, loss,

Anger, frustration over life and I got to hold you

You comforted me and made me whole, I was your father

And you were my cherished ginger princess

Yet my world was cruel and it created a cruel man

You grew to watch me strike out at your mother

And my booming anger damaged your gentle heart

Each angry word, each heated moment burnt a mark

Upon your kind soul

Until at seven you could no longer bear it

You found your voice, my anger returned to me

You screamed “I hate you”, I knew it and it destroyed me.